If a relationship leaves you feeling less connected to yourself...

If you've been realising that your experience with another has been leaving you feeling drained, triggered, walking on eggshells, feeling unsafe, confused, having to defend your boundaries etc...

Or it's perhaps more subtle but you've noticed you've been less yourself, less connected to your spiritual path or passions slowly over time during the duration of the relationship, or feeling that you can't express your true self fully in this connection...

Or maybe the relationship is usually flourishing but you have hit a rocky patch lately and trying to dive in and 'solve it' by being in each others' presence/ talking about the challenge isn't 'working'... The real 'problem' may be that you can't see clearly because you have been giving your power away to something or someone outside of yourself. (Sometimes the relationship we are called to shift is actually with a non sentient entity e.g. our relationship with drugs or disordered eating or even a job which is not the right fit for us) Giving yourself permission to step back, reflect, make friends with your true self again and hear the call of your spirit is the ultimate medicine. Your logical mind may say: "I don't know what to do about this situation" "I'm scared of losing this person/ this opportunity..." Get out of your logical mind and allow yourself to connect to your soul's intuitive wisdom. When you do this, the next piece of the puzzle is revealed to you. It could be a clear: "Yes! I know that this connection is no longer aligned for me and I know it's time to cut cords" Or "Now I have stepped back, I can see how my own ego contributed to our conflict. I can take accountability and see what happens from there whilst honouring myself" Or it could be: "I see I am carrying a lot of pain around this and talking to someone who I trust/ seeking guidance will help me to find my answer." You only actually 'need' to decide on your next step. There is no requirement to make big decisions (unless safety is threatened) - you can simply be in the moment and trust answers are on their way. One of the common blocks to this is that you might feel that it is 'selfish' to put yourself ahead of past loyalties or commitments. If you were able to psychically view the long term effects of choosing yourself and following what is authentic and true for you, you would get to see that it is actually profoundly selfless. When you are true to yourself, when you follow the path of your purpose and what truly feels right for you, you allow the world to rearrange itself for you and others so there is more love, more joy, more peace. Practically this perhaps means:

  • You end a friendship and a space has opened for you to make friends with someone who understands you. You join a new activity where you meet a soul sister. You both cherish this new connection, which would only have been possible if you followed your calling.

  • You end a friendship and your old friend is set free to find people who resonate with them at this stage in their journey.

  • You leave a job you don't enjoy and someone who is really grateful for the opportunity and genuinely enjoys it takes your place.

  • You leave a job and build your own business which goes on to help thousands (or even millions!) of people.

  • You ask your partner to express their love to you in a new way or to support you or make another change in the relationship and you discover your relationship is more flexible and resilient than you thought. Maybe they also feel relieved as they secretly wanted to share they felt the same way too! Or they are glad you are able to have honest communication and feel closer to you as a result.

  • You tell your partner that something they did really hurt you and they apologise, change behaviour and your relationship deepens as a result. You discover being loved deeper than you have ever experienced.

  • You tell a partner something they did really hurt you, you realise after the unfolding conversation that you aren't on the same page, you end the relationship, and feel a sense of relief and freedom and channel your newfound energy into a creative project which brings profound joy to others.

  • You leave a relationship and dive into the inner work. You find the love within yourself and your spiritual growth ignites so much healing in those around you.

  • You leave a relationship after sharing your truth and your previous partner learns and grows from the feedback and treats their next love like a God/dess!

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