We grew up in a culture that taught us to pretend and force ourselves to be 'happy'. Yet the magic is that if you surrender to any emotion that is happening for you in this moment, true peace arrives.
I am currently experiencing a heart expanded state with alllll the emotions. This has mostly included bliss, gratitude, spontaneous laughter, as well as longing, sadness and grief.
The 'negative emotions' in this spectrum are experienced differently when in deep surrender.
The sadness is also profoundly beautiful.
I can see that it has a purpose (even if I can't see ~what~ that purpose is yet) and I understand that all emotions and experiences are temporary, so there is no need to fight or change it. (When we learn classic meditation we learn to observe our thoughts like passing clouds - this is the meditative state brought into everyday reality).
Because I don't 'need' my negative emotions to leave, they are often replaced quickly with more waves of gratitude and bliss.
In fact I can hold these states simultaneously.
Some examples of this could be:
Disappointment but appreciation.
Anger but feeling empowered.
Heartbroken but heart open.
This is something that we can all become more skilled at.
Our experience of this may be affected by the circumstance (for example the death of a loved one will likely feel much more difficult and take more linear time to surrender into than having a 'bad day'). And we can deepen our ability to be in an inner state of surrender in any circumstance. (Inner surrender doesn't mean that we don't do anything in the outer world. You can take any action from a state of surrender. It simply means we are accepting that this is what has happened + we are going to work with doing the best with what we have rather than fighting against our reality.) We don't try to avoid our feelings, put on a 'brave face', or try to skip to the part where we feel excitement and pleasure again.
I like to describe the process of surrender as "whatever you are feeling, wrap that in a warm burrito of love".
"It's okay for me to feel this way. It doesn't make me a 'bad person'. My feelings are valid. My worth is not based on 'how happy' I am. I do not owe anyone a performance. I am also supporting my health by not holding onto physical tension. This will pass and I can cope. I accept myself fully as I am having this experience." ♥