As a 'healer' (said in the least 'spiritual ego' way possible ) what we are often given are challenges that become our path.
If I floated with ease and grace through my relationships, I would never have been drawn to this work!
If I hadn't been in anxious-avoidant dynamics I would never have become curious to find out why the same patterns were happening over and over again *pulls hair*
I have a health condition which can be challenging and so many of my friends have abandoned me over the years.
My spiritual path has also meant that I don't align with many past loved ones anymore.
Many people have admit I trigger them just by being myself because I hold a mirror to where they aren't ready to look at themselves that deeply.
In another timeline I might have stayed with a soulmate I was in a relationship with several years back.
I had a 'conscious relationship' (we weren't perfect but it was deep, loving, cute, meditating together, best friends stuff)
Instead the Universe gave me the message to leave and my world came crumbling down.
I've faced a lot of grief about the path that I was led down and all of the things and people I had to let go of to purify myself to Divine love. (It's a work in progress!)
Sometimes my ego has a little strop at the Universe when acting from integrity has not brought the 3D results I'd like.
"Why?! Why was I given such a difficult path?"
Today I am exhausted from crying, as the Universe brings about the next level of my soul's evolution.
I feel like a mess, and I'm making that okay.
Our human journey IS messy!
With all the pain that was coming up in my own life, it felt so hard to re-dedicate myself to doing this work.
But somewhere through the tears, grace began to touch me.
Ultimately it all comes down to returning to unconditional love - the only energy which can truly 'save' us from our suffering.
And so even if I feel low, lost, frustrated, confused, unworthy, any of that stuff, I get to surrender and come back home to love.
Unconditional acceptance that you (that I) am beautiful even when things feel ugly and that we can re-find the magic within no matter now many times we get lost.